Uh oh. I have sun-bleached streaks/bits in my hair.

I have a bandage tan line on my right arm.

I've lost my booties tan and regained my sandals tan. Sadly, my bikini tan is almost gone but my wetsuit tan is still there.

I know I need a haircut, and I know I'm in denial insisting that I do not need a facial.

I'm too sleepy to come up with proper sentences or anything substantial. Good night world.

Ego. Oh, sue me, please.

A sleepless night, panicking outside my house at 4.45am because I forgot to print my airport shuttle confirmation, stupid passengers who do not seem to understand what seat numbers are, perverted horny kids and ignorant parents although I did tell them about their son, hunger, new friends met on the plane and at the airport, coincidences, finishing the whole "The Art of Racing in the Rain" book on the plane, restlessness, hugs and sense of relief and tonnes of hawker food (zhao liu, popiah, rojak and sotong kangkung) later, I am home sweet home.

I'm on a single mattress on the floor, surrounded by my favourite plushies, my big purple pillows, 2 blue pillows and 2 smaller square pillows, my cube lamp, my dark purple wall and a newly painted pale purple wall. Ahh...so much has changed! But no matter what, it's good to be home!

I stayed awake the whole night. Perhaps it was a good excuse to "de-rail" from my final, final paper. Must be the 'hypertension' I've been having lately, due to exams, due to external factors, I've been feeling off-track lately. As I'm typing this, I've just forced myself off the bed, taken a quick cold shower, and instead of mugging the last minute, I thought it was best to do some theraphy here before facing the paper later.
I think exams change a person's mood, emotion and attitude. I really do. Either you turn into a giant blob, which goes on sucking and sucking in what's written on the books, and you become oblivious to your surroundings, OR you become like me, uncertain of your emotions, what you've read, what was been done and all you want to do is just lock yourself in the room. You'd prefer the darkness. Isolation.
I remembered when I first got into this relationship, or rather for a couple of my past relationships, MeiLing & Mel would ask, "Are you sure this is what you want?" and obviously, at that point, it was only the starting of the race, and with excitement, I would always say "Yes!!". And then Meiling would do her signatory saying which goes like this: "Just make sure you treasure her." with a smile, of course.
I've came a long way now. From beautiful relationships which I've crushed with my own bare hands, and to not-so-beautiful relationships, which I've abandoned. And last night, was perhaps, the stupidest decision I've made. I know, there's no reason to utter anything mentally-abusive when you are in an argument, especially when you come to think of it, perhaps, at some point I overreacted. I admit that. I tend to get slightly over-posessive sometimes. It's something you have to take in about me, if you want to be with me. I tried not to bring this negative element everytime I start a new relationship. I suppress my emotions. Acting all cool about what or what not that was done, until at some point, the pressure has turned tooo intense.
At one point, I remembered someone telling me not to give my 100% when I start this new relationship, because if you give that much, and when it ends, you get twice the pain. Obviously, I was stupid enough to have ignored his advice.

Each and everyone of us has a role to play. Whether it's the role of a daughter, son, parent, grandparent, husband, wife, girlfriend, boyfriend, student, lecturer, etc. You get the picture. With the given role, we are all expected to perform to it maximum and play our part, well. In most cases, such roles, come with rules and regulations, whether we like it or not, we have to obey them. For most cases, rules are broken, thus the issue of compatibility in role-taking.
A mental note. Just remember the role you are playing. Because there will be a day, people will get tired and thus, your role will soon be redundant. And you shall be replaced.

-- Told a friend, it's a risky investment, and from the looks of it, the stocks are going down. Time to scout for a new one then! 

Menyampah...
Menyampah aku melihat muka engkau. Babi sial.

Not only do I have to listen to crazy affair stories, problems with a guy assuming a friend is his girlfriend just like that,  breaking up with the same guy for the umpteenth time and hence is now free to go pick up chicks during gay night at a bar/club, smoking pot, baby talk and all, I now have to listen to stories about crazy suicidal guys. And I'm supposed to give suggestions on solving these problems. Am I really in the right course? The lives of my friends are like daily episodes of telenovelas.

Esther and I were supposed to go for Fluffy's (gay night) last night for fun. We were meant to be each other's wingwomen. AHAHA. I said not fair, cos obviously Esther will get all the attention. In How I Met Your Mother terms, she'll be Barney and I'm just Ted. I think the guys were a bit confused as to how straight we are when we were talking about that. Actually, I wasn't joking, neither was I entirely serious about it. So the lesbian topic came up.  Ozzie said she and her roomie were making out on Friday night in the bar and the guy that assumed that she was his girlfriend just stared in shock. HAHAHA. And one of the girls was saying how it's weird we're so grossed out by gay guys making out, but guys actually enjoy watching lesbian girls make out. I don't know why I decided to say this, but I went "Well, all straight men like that. Those who say they don't aren't straight or are lying". Everyone stared at me. What? So I had to look for reinforcement. Turned to the guys and asked "Isn't it true?" Only one of the guys was man enough to agree. HAHAHAHA. Well, I might have generalised there, but I'm not entirely sure how untrue my statement is. We did conclude in the end that while it'd be awesome to pick up chicks (quote Esther), it'd be rather depressing to see all the hot gay men only interested in guys. I have a fun mix of friends, huh? It's like the multi-flavoured jelly beans. Excitement in every bite.

Also, what's this Caucasian obsession with Asian girls? The funniest answer I've gotten from an Aussie so far is "That's because Aussie girls have that man's face. Not Asians." AHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA. I don't know what that meant, but it's still funny. Same like me asking Aussies about their obsession with jaggerbombs. "Oh it just sounds cool you know, like you bang your fist on the bar top and shout JAGGERBOMB!" *shrug*

I did some last minute shopping today. Went into every single shop on Queen Street, and could not find the dress I want. Impossible! It's more than coincidence that I've been seeing that dress style so many times in the span of a few days while the others have not. Argh. I'm a bit sad that I'll be leaving for home without that dress.

Then I headed to uni and got a new student ID. 15 bucks, bye bye. =(

Now I'm almost all packed and not quite ready to go home. I don't even know if I should sleep/nap because I leave the house at 4.45am.

They have started to put up the big Christmas tree and the Christmas archway and deco in the city. Too bad I won't be here to see the whole place decorated and lit up at night.

One of the first projects when I'm home is to recreate this. Rainbow cupcakes love.

Okie dokie, last post from Brissy for this year. A whole summer break adventure to begin! (or the lack of)

10 people came tonight. Not bad. There were 4 Malaysians, 2 Bruneians, 1 French, 2 Aussies, 1 Columbian. Whee. Too bad Maggie couldn't come. Would've been the sole American representative. haha.

Boardwalk had $7 pizza + schooner of beer. Awesomeness. My plan for one drink didn't work because they kept buying me drinks. Le sigh. I ended up with like 4-5 schooners of Blue Tongue and Toohey's (because they know I love Toohey's super cold! yup the -4C one, especially on a hot summer day), a bottle of Corona and a cocktail. Would've been 3 but I told them I've had enough. Haha! The good part about not getting presents is that they offer to buy you cocktails instead. Only Esther ended up buying me a cocktail because she was the first to offer me a drink. She bought me the awesomest creme de menthe, kahlua and baileys cocktail. Yum. In the words of Esther, "tastes just like After 8 chocolates". My 2nd cocktail was supposed to be rock n' roll which Ozzie wanted to get me. But I said I'll only drink if she drinks. And she was already all red. Haha!

We ended up walking to Irish Murphy's (my favourite Brissy bar!) and 3 days off was playing. This is my first time watching this band play (usually I only go when Jabba's playing), and I was very glad with that band. They were great! They played continuously without stops in songs, so the songs, no matter how varied, kinda just seemed to flow from one song to another. Plus the lead singer was in an arm sling, and the drummer sings solo bits too. Extra brownie points there! Woohoo! Jabba's still my favourite band to watch just for the amount of energy in their shows, the interaction with the crowd and the power guitar and drum solos. Hello, if anyone can play Jimi Hendrix guitar solos backwards and with their teeth, I'm sold.

We got our usual booth. Told ya our group is a lot like the gang in How I Met Your Mother. We have our favourite bar, we have our own booth, and we always order the same drinks. Our table had 2 jugs before going to the "stage zone". Wheeee. Bry seemed to had an affinity with this pole in the middle of the bar, and he got teased to no ends by me about how he should pole-dance.

Things weren't all that awesome though. Us girls decided to get out of the booth while the guys continued on beer-drinking. The second I got out, this guy asked me to dance. I said No thanks and sat back down. HAHA. Ozzie however started dancing in front of the stage, and this random guy suddenly kissed her. So she went back to the booth, and he sat down next to her! He got up to get drinks, and she asked Bry to sit next to her. The random guy almost sat on Bry when he got back!

We were singing to songs like My Sharona, Jesse's Girl and Learn to Fly till close to midnight. Got out of the bar, slightly deaf, and they surprised me by singing Happy Birthday outside the bar (their intial plan was to sing in the bar and try to get the band to sing along). A tad embarrassing to have a group sing that to me on the streets. Hehe. The rest all went to the train station, while Bry and I went to the citycat stop. And Bryan sure is weird when he drinks. He got so serious and started talking about my research. He started talking about phyla, chordates, and all kinds of bio-related stuff. o_0 Damn weird. HAHAHA. His citycat came first, so I was alone for awhile. And then Sal called and said they missed the last train so they were taking the citycat. Then I saw Esther got off a ferry (yeah the ferry is different from the citycat). Like EH! She was supposed to go to Fluffy's (gay night) at Family. Why is she here! HAHAHA. Randomness. Shim would love her. She starts talking enthusiastically about zombies and all after a few drinks. HAHA. So, in the end, all of us took the Citycat to Regatta in Toowong. Someone even had the cheek to ask if Regatta was still open. I just stared wide-eyed. Bunch of alcos. HAHA!

All in all, I had an awesome time today. They seemed pretty shocked that I was very okay with drinks for someone my size. You see, they didn't believe me when I told them I've never gotten drunk drunk cos I do know how to control my drinks. Ruben said "The last time I heard a Chinese guy say that, it didn't end too well". AHAHHA. But hey ho, their planned very well failed. In the end there were more red faces and crazy talk by the others than me. HAHAHA. At the end of the night, I said to Ruben "Told ya I don't get drunk that easily" and they all agreed. The key is to eat before drinking, drink in moderation, don't speed drink, hydrate and know when to stop. I know when I start being really talkative, giggly and happy. I think a bit more after that point, I'd start talking about unicorns and rainbows.

Food was awesome and cheap, drinks were good, the company was even better, and the view - oh, simply breathtaking. But I was so caught up with trying to talk with everyone at the outdoor table by the river that I didn't really get many pictures. Plus after the first picture, someone who held my camera VERY SMARTLY had her fingerprints ALL OVER my camera lens. I am not pleased with that. All my pictures of the night turned out blur and seemed washed out. I also didn't quite like that this girl kept budging into my conversations with other people. Please la I'm not talking to you. Can you please stop correcting my English and structure and how my ideas are wrong. I moved away a bit cos this girl loooves sitting very close to me. And I get very uncomfy. But she'll just move along. SIGH. Sometimes I try to put my bag next to me or say things like "Oh it's ok, you can sit with Sal. I'm fine here". Luckily it was a big group today, and after awhile I gave up trying to talk to Ozzie who was sitting next to this particular girl. I ended up talking more to the other half of the table. It helps that Esther's zombie talk was actually very amusing to listen to! She's the funniest when she imitated Brad Pitt's character in Inglorious Basterds. Oh gosh, very convincing indeed! I wonder if she realised that she's actually quite a good actor.

Thank you so much to everyone who made my day so special. And thank you for like the 50 messages I got on Facebook. And text messages too. It took me an hour or so replying everyone's text messages and Facebook messages. I'm hoping to get better pictures from Ozzie soon. She has awesome pictures of us trying to test the "smile detector" function on her camera. I gave out lots of hugs today and got many hugs too. I feel so loved. Haha.

Oh yeah, I somehow started to lose my voice towards the end of the night. I don't even think I was shouting much. :